sonics

Portlander’s Take on Seattle Supersonics and OKC Beef

Seattle Sulk

As the Thunder-Spurs series tips off, I cannot help but read the crossfire of tweets sent between Oklahoma City Thunder fans and former Seattle Sonics fans. One thing is apparent: Sonics fans, you sound kind of pathetic.

Look, I know it is hard to see your ex getting a ton of attention. You put her under wraps for awhile until they finally got wooed away by a cowboy with a big wallet and even bigger belt buckle. They look hot, like Gilbert Arenas hibachi hot.

I understand you not rooting for their success either. I do not know too many people that want to see their exes living the high life, but you have to pull it together.

You trash the city of Oklahoma City, but your town is the only one in the United States with more hipsters than Portland, which by default makes you the “Worst Dressed City in America.”

How much better does that make Seattle than Oklahoma City? Lets face it, the Seattle I grew up with never would have acknowledged OKC, because they were too busy comparing themselves to bigger and better things.

You guys are better than that, but lets take one last good hard look at it from a Portland perspective:

1). Your Ex Looks Good

Watching the Sonics-Thunder dynamic is like witnessing a marriage from afar between a haggard old bag and one with potential dissolve and then watching the one with potential hit the gym, buy some new clothes, and hook-up with a cougar or sugar daddy.

The franchise itself deserves to show off and I do not blame the jerk or witch for rubbing it in your face.

Seattleities, you had your chance. One person’s junk is another person’s treasure.

Your partner had tons of potential, but you took them for granted. They got a face lift (Chesapeake Energy), a nice body (development of Kevin Durant), some new assets (Russell Westbrook), and a whole new wardrobe (literally). They have the attention of every person in the room.

Back when the Sonics were Super (photo sportsecyclopedia.com)

2). Your Sonics Weren’t That Super

Whether it is about the good old days of the mid-1990’s with Shawn Kemp, Detlef Schrempf, Gary Payton, Nate McMillian, or the better older days with Dennis Johnson and Jack Sikma bringing home the NBA Championship in 1979, you guys made NBA fans put up with Vin Baker, Damien Wilkins, Chris Wilcox, and Robert Swift for awhile before Clay Bennett hijacked you.

I know Portland has had some hard luck as of late, (Greg Oden, Brandon Roy) but at least Portland’s draft picks haven’t all been DNP-Coach’s Decision (with the exception of Oden).

Washington Huskies and Gonzaga Bulldogs games at Key Arena were more entertaining to watch than Sonics games for awhile.

3). Justice for Giving Struggling Teams New Stadiums

Your city awarded franchises that weren’t very good in the late 1980’s and early 1990’s with new stadiums.

While Safeco Field and CenturyLink Field are amazing venues to watch games in, the fact is the teams that inhabit them sucked back when the Sonics were doing work in the Western Conference.

When they were looking for a new building, taxpayers were fed up and broke with the funds used to build the other two. Who could blame them? That said, the logic was wrong from the get-go.

The future of the Sonics now is the leader of the Thunder (photo discountdisplaycases.com)

While Safeco might have been the “House that Junior Built” who the heck built Qwest? Curt Warner? That was just a bad business model to give corner offices to your worst performing employees.

4). Howard Schultz

On second thought, since half of Portland and Seattle is employed by Starbucks, I can see why you do not really take the time or energy to point out his disastrous role in this.

Health insurance and a good caramel macchiato is tough to come by in this economy. That said, I would love to see his memoir on how he botched the Sonics sale up. May I suggest the title: “Double Pump-Fake: How the Ultimate Barista Outsourced a Piece of Seattle’s Heart:”

I sympathize.

I agree with those of you that think records set by Oklahoma City should not count as “Sonics” records.  Those should be left alone and resumed when Seattle hijacks Sacramento’s or Charlotte’s franchise.

Inevitably, you will get your team back. The fans are too good and you were thrown under the bus by too many politicians and businessmen that underestimated the Sonics’ importance.

When the time comes for you and your 15 ballers to be reunited, I hope for the sake of the fan experience, Key Arena won’t get the Sonics 2.0. In Portland, we miss the I-5 rivalry, almost as much as you miss the green, yellow, and white.

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