My Bud In Oregon
The latest coming out of Eugene and the University of Oregon are estimates that 40 to 60 percent of the football program smokes weed according to past and current players.
While I will never understand why players sellout each other and the alma maters that helped make them millions of dollars, as a member of the NWSportsbeat.com staff, I love that they provide fodder for our loyal readers.
Nobody should be shocked by the estimate given Eugene’s history of embracing the “Hippie lifestyle.”
Here are five things that we know about Oregon and marijuana.
1). “The Original Whizzinator” Onterrio Smith and Cliff Harris
There are two incidents that perfectly encapsulate why nobody should be shocked that this news is coming out of Eugene.
The school produced an offensive player that tried to used a fake penis to get through security and a defensive one that admitted to police during a traffic stop that all of the weed had been smoked when questioned why his ride smelled like reefer.
I present to you: Onterrio Smith and Cliff Harris.
Smith sliced up defenses as a college back, rushing 419 times for 2,199 yards and 19 touchdowns as an Oregon Duck, but in 2005 as a Minnesota Vikings running back, the Oregon alum was busted by Minneapolis airport security for packing on an OW.
The device featured a fake penis that allegedly produced synthetic urine which helps someone “test clean” for a pending drug test.
Not shocking that he came from Oregon, given this story.
Cliff Harris’ short lived on-the-field experiences were nothing short of sensational. His speed was incredible in the secondary, an element he used to his advantage as a returner on special teams as led the national in punt return touchdowns with four in 2010.
The problem was he could not keep himself from getting blazed away from Autzen. In 2010, Harris’ Nissan Altima was clocked 118 mph and subsequently pulled over for it a few seconds later.
The car driven by Harris, featured a flock of Duck players and allegedly smelled like pot according various police reports. When asked by police if there was any in the car, Harris replied: We smoked it all.” Enough said.
2).It is EUGENE
Chicks with hairy arm-pits and cactus legs. Tye-dyed shirts. Hacky Sacks and bongs.
A Grateful Dead tour stop. Rallies about third-world labor issues caused by a company who happens to buy you BCS appearances and athletic stadiums. Phil Knight’s beard. Outside of the intersection of Haight and Ashbury in San Francisco, there is no other place where the hippie movement is more transcendent than in Eugene, Oregon.
Dressing like a homeless person and smoking cannabis are two of the pre-requesities of being a hippie, and therefore obtaining a passport to Eugene.
Remember, athletes just want to fit in like everybody else.
3). Chip, We Have a Problem
It is commonly accepted, for better or for worse, that almost all campuses (outside of Brigham Young and a couple of others) feature students that experiment with weed (and I wouldn’t put it past BYU students either).
Is anybody really surprised to hear the report that 40 to 60 percent of athletes in Eugene smoke weed? The shocking number is the range is ONLY goes up to 60 percent.
Most people would have expected more.
The only time that there is a pot problem at the University of Oregon is when someone smokes it all and refuses to go down the block to get more.
4). Why they Lost to USC Last Season
Chip Kelly and his flock were destined for a rematch with Louisiana State at the BCS National Championship.
All they needed was to take care of the Trojans and rival Beavers and they were set. Outside of Los Angeles, nobody could explain how the Ducks lost to the Trojans 38-35 in a six-versus-four thriller at Autzen Stadium.
We finally have a logical explanation. A chip-shot field goal from Alejandro Maldonado was all the team needed to send the game into overtime and put away Lane Kiffin, Matt Barkley and company.
Here’s the explanation, the guys were HIGH! They hung up 35 points… HIGH! This also clears the air as to why the Ducks’ new lockers have personal venting systems as well.
5). Hence, Ducks are Flying High
And you thought all of those references were allusions to Pac-12 winning streaks, bowl appearances, and an explosive offensive. Boy that was wrong. How good is that offense if four starters were high on the entire season?
Forget Michael Phelps’ 2008 Beijing Olympics, a half-baked team winning a Vizio Rose Bowl over Wisconsin could quite possibly be the greatest victory ins spite of performance inhibitors in amateur sports history.
Pass over the Pringles, Puddles.
In Oregon’s defense, marijuana is not a Duck problem, but rather a college one.
Kelly can’t be blamed for this and ESPN could have easily done a story on any major college program and found similar results but chose not to.
Picking a college program with recent success in a town known for a half-century long counterculture movement was easy; however they could have just as likely found results in Tuscaloosa, Austin, or Gainesville that were not all that different from they found in Eugene.
This isn’t an Oregon problem, this is a college one.