Game 57 Avalanche vs. Canucks: Hockey Gods Aren’t Happy With Vancouver

The Nucks Need to Shape Up

If you’re like me, you believe there is a higher being in the form of “Hockey Gods.”

The Hockey Gods can strike at any time or shine upon your falling hopes when you have stopped believing.

Hockey Gods Canucks Playoffs

One bad hand, We're goners!

They can be cruel, daunting, antagonizing and tease the hell out of you all at the same time.

What the Canucks and their fans have gone through lately has been nothing short of agonizing. It’s been injury after injury, shootout after shootout and boring game after boring game.

The thing that makes it such a tease is that they are still allowing Vancouver to get points. I don’t want to say I don’t believe in this team anymore because I always will. Believing is the stimulus that makes the hockey gods happy. If you don’t believe, you aren’t a true fan and trust me; the hockey gods appreciate true fans.

Nonetheless, the Canucks take on Colorado Wednesday evening in a rematch of a game on February 4th that the Canucks barely squeaked out of with two points. I think we can all agree the Canucks didn’t even deserve one point out of said game.

A late goal and a fortuitous go-around in the shootout, Vancouver officially had a horseshoe lodged up their butts.

So when the two teams face off Wednesday, maybe these are some things fans and the team can do so as not to tick off those hockey gods anymore. For if we do continue on with that trend, the high hopes we have now may be all for naught come Spring.

Fans Leaving Early

If you’ve read my stuff for a while, you would know that I am a huge Anti-Bandwagoner. I even wrote a story on what makes you a bandwagoner.

Check it out here >> You Might Be A Bandwagoner 

What to my wondering eyes should appear Monday versus Phoenix, but patches of empty seats during a pan of the crowd in the 2nd round of the shootout?

It’s bad enough to leave when your team is losing horribly, but to leave before a winner has been decided in a shootout? Give me a break. Nothing is worse. If you were one of those people, you should be ashamed. That is unless, as my Mom used to say, someone was dying or your house was on fire.

The Hockey Gods frown upon bandwagoners and frankly, we need less of them.

Mr. Vigneault Has Been Bad

Dear Alain Vigneault,

You have always preached that if you’ve been good lately, you’ll play; pretty much a ‘what have you done for me lately’ motto.

Yet you persist to assign Cody Hodgson, the 6th leading scorer on the team, to the 4th line. Cody deserves better at if I’m being completely honest, I wouldn’t blame him if he demanded a trade out of here.

Coach Vee, listen here. I understand the theory of putting someone on the 4th line to keep it afloat but in my humble opinion, it would be more beneficial to put Mason Raymond or Jannik Hansen on the 4th line. Oh wow, Ryan Kesler has 7 points in 7 games; that isn’t even that good.

We’re talking about the Selke Winner here and he should be putting up more than a point per game.

Same goes with the Sedins who you insist on putting with Byron Bitz of all people.

So to wrap this short letter up, my point is you are wasting away the talent of a humongous talent that was dropped into your hands by a GM who is leagues ahead of you.

The Hockey Gods do not approve.



The Bunniness is Killing Me

It was Valentine’s Day Tuesday, but it’s like this unofficial holiday is extended to a week in the hockey world.

The issue of course is puckbunnies which are almost the same thing as bandwagoners. Needless to say, those guys up in the sky watching down on the ice are surly when it comes to these bunnies.

All week long, it’s how sexy Ryan Kesler is or how adorable Cory Schneider was three years ago. NO! He looks the freakin’ same for Richard’s [Maurice] sake.

It’s those or how cute Chris Higgins and Maxim Lapierre look together or, “OMG LOOK AT THAT SKANK FINETTE KISSING FIN; I WANT FIN SO BAD.”

Ryan Kesler Canucks Avs

Ryan Kesler needs to re-initiate BEAST MODE!

If you have no idea what that reference is about, check this out: Fin & Finette

Give me a break! The Canucks do not want to marry you. They don’t want to be your man. They will never give you roses on Valentine’s day…EVER!

Sorry to dash all your hopes and dreams.

It’s a Funny Circle

On one hand, the Hockey Gods are punishing us the fans with boring games that also end up being concluded with shootouts.

In fact maybe Monday, they heard someone talking about all the shootouts but thought someone said shutout. Accordingly, Phoenix scored.

But on the other hand, we’re being punished for these things because the players aren’t playing their damn hearts out every night like they should be.

As fans, we should be fed up with all the clichés guys like Ryan Kesler and Roberto Luongo spew game after game. Heck, Henrik Sedin may be the worst for that.

He should be the most candid, but it’s, “We just need to try harder,” and “…we need to play for 60 minutes next time.”

YOU SAID THAT LAST TIME!!!!!111!1!!1!!!!

Grow some hair on your chest, man up and go out on the ice each and every night and play your game; because each of your games is good enough to not only make the Hockey Gods happy but win the all coveted holy grail of hockey, the Stanley Cup.

So to conclude, we should all bow down right now and pray to the great Hockey Gods that we don’t have to endure any more shootouts, the Canucks can blow some teams out and that our hopes going into the playoffs aren’t false.

Puck drop is at 7pm on Sportsnet Pacific and Team1040 Radio.


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About Josh Hall

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  • Honestly, let’s cut AV some slack with Hodgson. Judging by The Sedins, Cory Schneider, Kevin Bieksa, Alex Burrows, Ryan Kesler, Jannik Hansen etc he has a superb track record of developing young talent and it’s built on very slow incremental progress. As long as Cody realizes this, as well as realizing that despite Grabner’s first line ice-time on Long Island he isn’t coming close to making the playoffs nevermind a shot at the cup, he should be fine. Kid’s young. He has a long career ahead of him.
    Let’s trust that the experts are in fact experts and know what they’re doing.

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